A NATRC's rider sad news today

A NATRC rider just posted that she had to put her horse down, due to a broken leg he received in his lot. Once again, thoughts are on Finny. Here was my words to her:

"I am so sorry to hear this. I know how you feel, as it just about ripped my heart out when I had to put my horse down last Oct due to colic. I was sad for a very long time. I couldn't ride where I rode him. Every time I thought I was over the hurt, something would happen and I would start hurting again. I feel better now, and not as sad as I used to be. I will always miss him. But I have a lump in my throat now. So I try to think of something that makes me happy about him, or a ride we had. That took a long time to be able to do.

If you ever need to just express how you are feeling on any different day, just email me. It does still help to have someone send me a special saying, or think about me, or just ask. I miss my horse dearly, as I know you do.

It does take time. I felt guilty for a long time. Don't go there. We all do the best we can with the circumstances that we have at the time. Would I do things different now? yes, we all would. But now we take that knowledge and move on.

hugs,
Brenda

When I think things are better, news like this make me feel very sad all over again. Friends have told me that years later, they still ache for that special horse that was in their life. Now that Finny is gone, I must say he had to have been very special to me, without my realizing it, until he was gone.

Isn't life like that sometimes? We need to see what is truly important and appreciate it. A friend's post to me said what I always believe, "Things happen for a reason".

After Finny was gone, I couldn't ride. I think I only rode 3 times in 6 months. Then I started to hurt less, and I started looking at Shaggy. I have always liked how he looked. Now he is the horse I have as I continue my Centered Riding journey. This feels right.

I had looked at some gaited horses over the last 8 1/2 months, but there wasn't one that seemed quite right. I looked at Savannah, and even though she was only 4, I liked the way she stood quiet. I liked the way that the rider rode her. And I liked how I knew the breeder and knew how well the breeder took care of her horses. I didn't hesitate and Savannah came home with me that day to start a trail riding/CTR career with me. This feels right also.

I have one more big decision to make and it is about my stud. I know what I want to do. I think I am just waiting on timing. We bred 2 mares, and I'll see if they are in foal. Or maybe I need to wait until they are on the ground and rebreed. Then I would like Duke to be my horse that I will take dressage/English lessons on. I have always heard, and believed, that dressage principles can be applied to any style of riding. Centered Riding wants us to work on our own education, and I can't think of any better horse I want to ride than Duke. For those who have heard me talk of him, I have been thinking of gelding him for many years. He is the horse to continue my education on and to work on dressage. I think the time has come and this feels right.

I didn't think I would type so much. But when something happens in your life that makes you think, then you better stop and think. The death of another good horse that has someone hurting as much as I hurt is sad. But it makes me realize what I do have in my life. Shaggy was here and I probably wouldn't be at where I am with him if Finny hadn't died. I may not have bought Savannah, but bought a different horse last fall. I may continue to put Duke on the back burner.

We all can say that when we hear of death, we appreciate what we have even better. Every day I work with horses, I need to remember this. I can share the love I had of riding Finny, and for Finny, with many other horses. Every day I work with horses, I want to tell myself that God has given me a gift and I need to use it to the best of my ability. He has given many of us this gift. Our love of horses.

Horses are our Lives. I'll blog more about this on my blog,
http://myblog-horsesareourlives.blogspot.com/

Become a friend.

"Embrace the Journey!"
Brenda