I Cherish Your Memory

I cherish your memory.  Time has passed.  You were so strong, yet so delicate.  You were my little colt, orphaned at 1 month to turn into a tall black horse.  What a pistol as a weanling, yearling, 2 year old.  So small and so light on your feet that I could almost pull you over on the lunge line.  So graceful as a 3 and 4 year old.  So easy to ride.  Your lope was lovely.  I miss you so much.  I cherish the years we had together, even though so few, yet so meaningful.

 

Over the past 3 years, the grief has turned into pain, into heartache, into sadness and guilt and into so many questions.  Why?  Why now?  Why so soon?  Understanding comes in time.  I still don’t understand.  But I don’t grieve.  I am sad and my heart still aches.  But I can think of you without crying.  Even though a lump forms in my throat when I think like this.  I was able to hang a picture of you this year.  I have looked at photos of you and me.  Now I think of what we had and I don’t think so much of what we missed out on.  The good memories need to come so this terrible lump and tears forming in my eyes go away.  With time, comes acceptance.  I have accepted the fact that you are gone.  I just don’t like it though.  Sometimes, I catch myself just looking out into the fields and thinking and remembering.  I feel you there, even when I’m on a different horse. 

From http://www.searchquotes.com/quotes/about/Acceptance/

“Acceptance, though a hard thing to do, is an essential thing that helps you to improve in life. When you accept a friend as such with his plus and minuses, you gain friendship. When you accept a past deed, you prepare yourself to face the future, when you accept a situation, you become more comfortable. Acceptance is the essence of life and if we try to shun away from acceptance, life becomes a bed of thorns.

As K C Theisen said, acceptance is not submission; it is an acknowledgement of the facts of the situation. It also helps you to decide your future course of action. Those who accept things that cannot be changed are as wise as grass that grows in the riverbeds and those who refuse to accept are like trees there. When a storm blows, the grass accepts and survives but the tree falls to the power of the wind. Acceptance is an important character that we have to inculcate in us, to survive successfully in this world.”

I will love you forever.  I will miss you forever.  Until we can meet at Heaven’s Bridge and you can carry me home.  I’m not crying.  I look up to the heavens to watch you gallop by.

 

Finny

May 26, 2001 - October 10, 2009

Happy Memorial Day

I wanted to get this message out sooner!

Thanks to all of our service men and women who served and who are serving now.


Thank you for keeping America safe. Thank you for our freedoms. Thanks to all the family members who served.

In my family, my brother served in the Vietnam war, my dad in the Korean War, and some of Tom's uncles in WW II.
I hope all your family members have been kept safe.
God bless and may He keep them safe and in his fold.

Finny's Farewell Book

My daughter, Sara, Made me a Farewell Book of Finny. I just love this first pic, as it shows his soft eye, during a fun ride time we had one day in the field, on a warm fall day. I'll always remember that day, taking pictures as I rode. She wanted this book to be a surprise, but she needed me to send her some info. Finny's CTR judge's cards, maps of the places that I rode, the sympathy cards and thoughtful notes from friends, and from others who only knew me by the big black horse I rode. This book will always have a special place on a shelf, as Finny will always have a special place in my heart.

Thank you, Sara and Tom, and others, who are helping me to get over Finny's death. The sadness is being replaced with fond memories.

Finny's Farewell Book...